Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Throw the Book at Him! - How Do We Know It's God?

I grew up in an era when books were pretty much the only alternative to TV. I am sure you love your Kindle, but I had some favorite books with real pages and everything. My most treasured was The Wind in the Willows, which I received as a birthday gift from my grandfather in 1963. It was inscribed with a blue fountain pen. I couldn't read back then, but it was in a wonderful paper wraparound jacket and a green tweed like cloth binding.

My mother would sit on my bed and read it to me. The experience is much less about the story line or the plot, but the experience of the book - turning pages, my mother's voice; its changing cadence and emphasis, depending on the character. When she read to me I could hear the wind in the willows.

When I started to read, I had some childhood favorites: Little Toot, Winne the Pooh, Harold and the Purple Crayon, and The Little Engine that Could. I can hear that words "I think I can, I think I can." as if I was there in my upper bunk, reading by flashlight. I loved Dr Seuss too.

My mother used to take us to The Channel Book Store on the Yale campus. I guess it's gone now - probably a Borders or something. We often went to the library where I would quietly scan the shelves of books looking for one that caught my attention. I loved the books, and after I got saved, I used to go to a book store called Amazing Grace. I had a stint of unemployment, and I went as often as I could to look, to read, and to fellowship.

For me, books and magazines were my Internet. I wanted to know everything that I could about the subjects that interested me: hockey, motocross, skiing, mechanics, music, photography, Christianity, and later computers. At my first computer school I managed to plow through 3,000 pages of software manuals during a 12 week class.

What seems amazing to even me, is that I had such a hard time reading. I failed English and/or Reading 9 of my 12 years of education. I had dyslexia which no one did anything about it. The teachers laughed at some of my transpositions - they always seemed to make a funny word. On occasion my wife also finds it amusing.

I still liked books - and collected a lot of them. I had 12 versions of the Bible, 4 of which I read in two years.

I still really like the Bible, and I enjoy reading it - especially the Message. I have different versions that I use for different reasons. For many years I memorized verses in the Revised Standard - a throw back to my studies at Bethel. I studied the D. L. Moody Bible series and I used the King James version for that. I attended a Southern Baptist Church in the 90's and we used the New International Version there. At my next church we used the North American Standard, and I read the Amplified Bible for devotions. I went to ministry school and there, we used the New King James version. My Online Bible turned me on to Greek and Hebrew. And I had an audio Bible as well.

For many years I thought that I could gain a lot of knowledge about the Bible and become an expert by studying it and reading it. I went to conferences, read books by the most educated Christian scholars and heard hundreds of sermons too!

I actually became a worshipper of the Bible, not the God reveled in it. I could spout Bible like a gushing fire hydrant.

The problem with being a "Bible spouter" is that you have to be intellectual, legalistic, or arrogant - or some combination of the three. And one day you meet up with someone that is grounded in the word, not stuck in some religious interpretation. Then you are done - well done. Their insights are God's insights, not something they learned from another Christian. The Pharisees were legalistic, and Jesus rebuked them for intellectualizing the law.

The parts of the Bible that I am certain of are the ones that God himself has revealed to me. As Jesus opened the eyes of the disciples to the very fact that He was the Messiah of the Old Testament, God has opened my eyes to facets of truth that are important to me and MY relationship with the Creator.

A lot of folks ask questions such as this: "How do you know which is the correct interpretation or version of the Bible?" My answer, the one that brings YOU close to Jesus in a way where YOU can hear his voice. I know, because my relationship is with Jesus, not with the Bible. Reading different versions helps me better understand the intent of the writers and interpreters, but it may not tell me what God is saying to David.

If a verse or passage is not illuminated to us, and opened in our spirit, we are simply engaging in debate, opinion, and theological argument where Christianity becomes a philosophy. What we need is for the eyes of our hearts to be opened, and to be like the Bereans, looking into the word for ourselves. In the process of searching for it like silver, we are likely to enjoy rhema (living word) - hearing God's voice.

Personally, I think it's hard to understand the Bible, but what I have found is that God makes it easy - well if I have faith. I often challenge verses that seem pretty main stream. I want to make sure what I am being taught is the truth. I go after the versus and passages that others say are difficult.

In the end, there isn't going to be a written test. He is not going to ask us if we figured it all out. He is not going to mention our fancy-dancy leather Bible case, or perfectly straight underlines and high-lights. He isn't going to ask you if you read it, He'll want to know if you lived it. And then Jesus will look into your heart and mine to see if His word is there beneath the seal of the Holy Spirit.

How about you, what's your process for understanding the truth of the word of God? How do you hear the wind?

Monday, March 8, 2010

Idiot's Sightseer Guide to Sunday Morning

I've been going to church for a long time - too long maybe! I have noticed that church folks grow accustom to certain rituals. Hell, they even try to sit in the same place each Sunday.

How about you, are you a creature of religious habits? I'd like to think that I am not, but I am. I still sit in the back row posting Facebook "stati" as though I am at a Boston Bruins game in sudden death overtime.

Apparently someone noticed me. Even the back row, normally reserved for other bored folks, is no longer private. How far have we fallen? On Sunday morning there was a screen requesting that we shut off our cell phones! I am thinking that the woman with spiritual distemper who stood behind me last week, said something to the pastor. I laughed out loud when I saw it! And if I'd had a mouth full of coffee, I would have projected a mixed organic mist at least two or three rows forward; taking out the bald guy with the huge wife and his family along with a few teenagers and the crazy lady with the tambourine.

Here are some religious habits that seem to have caught on as I have toured the manicured American church.

Jeans and T-Shirts - that is the new "Sunday best," and apparently seeing as we only go to church once a week, casual Sunday is as good as it gets. I have a t-shirt that says; "What Wouldn't Jesus Do?" so that I can fit in.

Coffee Drinking - some denominations have become like the Dunkin' Jesus chain (probably Baptists - j/k) . Depending on the time of year, they have clear plastic silk screened cup; recycle #5, filled with iced, double caffeinated, whipped, caramel-mocha-nut-drizzle-swirl with foaming whipped cream and 5 sugars. Crack-in-a-cup for short. Caffeine and spirituality go hand-in-hand. And for leaders, there's sushi too.

Electric Guitars - the amplified guitar appears to have been added because any music you would sing at church, you would never listen to at home because it is too wimpy. The addition of the "electric guitar" is designed to drown out the voices of the musically challenged - church pros also shut off the lights during worship to protect the identity of the rhythmically challenged.

Overhead Projection - meant to provide assistance to those that don't know what a hymnal is. Thank God the overhead projectors with transparencies are gone! We now have state-of-the-art computer projection with majestic backgrounds - and lots of typos - which are best fixed while they are displayed. And one more question, who's idea was it to put the screen in front of the cold air return so that it shimmers? At first I thought it was a theophany.

Starting a Sermon with a Funny Story - It seems that humor brings the anointing for the sermon. I think Jay Lenno should have a church - bajillions would come to church.

First Time Visitor Cards - name address and email so we can SPAM you. Beware, some churches parade around visitors and newcomers like the dessert tray at an fine Italian restaurant. I was really hoping to have more room for a few key resume points in case they have any opening for a resident wise-guy. I haven't had that much luck with these, but I keep trying.

Bored Teens - heads down texting, iPods and Game Boys and Jesus metal t-shirts. Interesting they have time for these activities - probably because they are at the pinnacle of their intelligence. For ways to deal with church boredom click HERE.

Free Gift - How subversive is that? We won't make you stand up in front of the congregation, but we'll parade you around with a gift bag that fits a CD of outdated worship like spandex on a hippo. And you don't know it, but the mints are of a special tincture used to alert the --

Greeters - like mating cheetah, these are the folks hired to shake your hand while they talk to their friends from small-group. Well, first impressions are not of God. The very fact that someone was nice to you once, is not enough "confirmation" to join a church.

How about you - are you religious? Does it seem like some things missing?

Sunday, March 7, 2010

I'm No Rock-Star - The Man from Argentina

I often think about how the Body of Christ needs to work together to accomplish that which God wants to do. For years we have heard all the big names in Evangelical, Charismatic and Pentecostal ministry circles. From Benny Hinn to Billy Graham, we have seen them perform.

What we haven't seen very often, is a team approach; a body of many parts working together for the Kingdom.

I confess that I was part of the superstar or rock-star generation. In some cases the athletes of my day were virtual one-man teams like Michael Jordan or Bobby Orr. Rock superstars like Jimmy Page or Sting, could make CD's with anyone they wanted to. They only required some assistance, not a team. God has a way of dealing with each one of us individually; here is what happened to me.

One of my Brazilian friends got me an invitation to minister with him on the South Coast of Massachusetts. Our team consisted of a preacher, my interpreter; an evangelist, another friend with a healing gift and me. The church where the service was being held was also where the famous evangelist D. L. Moody had once preached. As I read the plaque on the wall I felt humbled by his accomplishments for the Kingdom. He was a superstar in his day.

I met the pastor and his wife along with some of the members of a small Brazilian congregation; about 40. The service began with worship and during that time a drunken man came in. I was impressed with the pastor as he and some of the members ministered to him. I think it took the man a few minutes to understand that the service was being held in Portuguese. Once he discovered that, he left quietly. My friend the preacher took to the pulpit and spoke about the "Spirit and The Bride", a favorite worship song of mine.

It was my turn to take the platform when I stopped and asked the worship leader to play another song and then I stopped to pray. My friend who was interpreting looked at my like, "this isn't the order of the service." I remember ministering to one, maybe two members when a man with a guitar came in shouting in Spanish. The interpreter told me that he wanted to use the sanctuary and had a document saying that he could do so. He actually wasn't scheduled to use the church for about another 45 minutes, thought he insisted we needed to leave. He continued shouting and engaged some of the members in an argument. There were threats from both sides. It was like a South America soccer match. My Korean friend stepped right in the middle of it all and rebuked the man in Jesus' name. The pastor suggested that we all leave and join him in his apartment a few blocks away. It was so crazy; they even left the offering basket on one of the pews.

Back at the apartment, I simply began to minister pretty much where I had left off. What interested me was a man that was from the other church, the one which the screaming guitar player was a pastor of. He came to the apartment and began to point his finger and poked me in the chest. He said, "You are a false prophet and the gift is from the devil." Wow, in the natural I was a bit frightened as this man was 100 lbs. heavier, and about 4 inches taller then I am.

All of a sudden I heard the Holy Spirit whisper to me, "Tell him he has 2 sons." So I did, he stopped for a moment to listen. Then I felt the Lord prompt me to tell him about one son here in the US and another In Argentina... one in jail and the other with troubles. He nodded in agreement. "And your wife," I said. "What is wrong with her back," I asked? "Where is she?"

"She is in the car, I will get her." He said as he headed for the staircase.

His wife came in and my friend with the healing gift prayed for her. God supernaturally un-fused the six vertebra in her back which she had previously had surgery on! She fell to the floor under the Power. When she arose, she could bend over and touch her toes! The man was so convinced of the presence and power of God he began to cry. He sobbed "Mouchos gracias Jesus!" The power of the Holy Spirit then came on Him and it took three men to catch him and steady the bookcase and TV as he fell to the floor.

His wife kept bending over to make sure that her healing was for real. As he was leaving he said. "Mi amigo, usted es un hombre de Dios." (My friend, you are a man of God.) He must have hugged me two or three times before he left that night. His wife kept crying and shouting Gloria a Dios - Glory to God!

Mouchos gracias Jesus!

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Watch This! - How Do You Spend Your Time?

I gave my youngest a watch a few years ago. She still isn't old enough to tell time - but she wore it like fine jewelry. I spent a few minutes with her watching the time change on the digital face. As the minutes ticked off, which is pretty boring, she quickly lost her enthusiasm.

I tried to make our playtime last a little longer, so I did a little role playing. Trust me I'm no Barney or Big Bird. "Oh what time is it?" I said, making a different voice, pretending to be her, "It's three-o-five." I did my little skit a few more times and then it was her turn..

"Princess, what time is it?" I said, pointing to the watch.

"Time for you to leave, Daddy."

"Hey - "

I guess I should have gotten her a stopwatch.

Time is an interesting "thing" - fascinating in fact. Because time is so important to us, we have lots of words to describe it. HERE are some Time Terms This is not a sermon-ette on getting saved, the up coming 2010 election, or an appeal to stop Global Warming. I was just thinking about time and some of the ways we perceive it.

Time is cool, and here is how some folks spent theirs. The record for the 100 dash is officially 9.1 seconds and for the Boston Marathon it is 2 hours, 7 minutes and 14 seconds. Charles Lindbergh flew the North Atlantic in 33 and 1/2 hours, the Concorde did it in 3 1/2 hours. The average college education takes 4 years, and the average sentence for drug smuggling is 72.7 months; just over 6 years. For an elephant, it takes 22 months from conception to birth and for a tarantula it is 7 weeks plus 3-6 days to hatch once the egg is laid.

For most of us, times and dates are a way to put events behind us, as well as keeping the future organized and sometimes out of reach.

Peter said that life is just a vapor. We all know that in the tough times, time seems to slow down, and in the good times it seems to evaporate. What do you think it was like on the cross for Jesus? He was there for a while.

On average, in the US, life expectancy is somewhere between 70 and 80 years which is about 27,759 days or 666,216 hours (2,398,377,600 seconds). Which means that we spend approximately the following amount of time:

Sleep - 9,240 days
Work - 4748 days
Commuting - 292 days
School - 765 days
Church - 234 days
Eating - 1716 Days
Watch TV - 262 Days
In the Bathroom - 568 days (without gender consideration - some folks are "stallers")
Have Sex - I'm not going there - let's just say a few minutes a week doesn't add up to much over a lifetime.
Waiting In Line - 84 days Unless you've been to Disney World for Spring Break, then it's 104.
Time With Kids - 294 days
Time Alone With Spouse - 441 days

These are my own calculations - you can do your own with my handy Whiz-Bang Time Wasted Calculator.

I find it interesting that if we spend a lifetime going to church, it is still less than the amount of time we spend in the bathroom or watching TV. Sort of makes you want to say "Lost", "Let's Make a Deal", "Have a Crappy Day", "All 255 Body Parts Clean" instead of "Jesus Loves You."

On the timeline of life, do you know where you are? Tell us how you'll spend what you have left.
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Wednesday, March 3, 2010

The S Word - As If N and F Were Not Enough

Is it me, or do you find it amazing that our liberal, free speech advocates - promoters of tolerance and political correctness - are just plain "stupid!" There I said the S word. And let me follow it up by using the N word - nincompoops, and the F word: fools!

Apparently we can all get along until the Christian religion - specifically the words "God" or "Jesus" are brought up in the public forum as if it is pornographic. Yet we are to be tolerant of other religions, scientific theories, sexual promiscuity as well as various other political views and lifestyles that are in direct opposition to the biblical world view we've been called to die for. These "bans" are foolish and dangerous displays of arrogance.

A teacher had a banner in his class room that quoted the Declaration of Independence. A banner, which had been displayed for seventeen years, contained this excerpt: “All Men Are Created Equal, They Are Endowed By Their Creator.”

One school official in Ann Arbor, MI justified himself as he banned the 1st amendment expression by claiming a Muslim student might be offended by the slogan. HERE is the complete article.

When was the last time you heard Christians suing the government to end Jewish or Muslim rights in the public forum? Christians have sued, but as far as I can tell, it is to keep their freedom of religion and speech, not reduce that of others.

In 2nd grade my brother had a black friend. Peter used to come to the house to play and was just one of the kids. His parents were educated at Yale, and they drove a gray Mercedes. Living in an all white New England town they were well liked and accepted - well, until some bigots tried to burn a cross on their front lawn.

In 4th grade my teacher was Jewish, and she told her wide-eyed, predominantly Catholic class, all about Hanukkah and the other holidays she celebrated without censure. No one complained.

When I was in 5th grade, we learned about government and politics. Richard Nixon was running against Hubert Humphry and George Wallace that year. MORE Mr. Pokrob, who was probably a liberal, presented the platforms of all three candidates without prejudice. Our class had a vote and Nixon won - well, the other guy was for education and we were stuck in class - what would you do? In January, we watched Nixon's inaugural speech on TV.

My point is simply that race, religion and political affiliation were just part of life. It seemed like all moderate - and some strong expressions - of individuality were accepted without question. What absolutely appals me is that we continue to take to court, cases that waste time and effort to redetermine, what seem to be reasonable and moderate expressions of faith, and opinion protected by our 1st Amendment rights.

How is it that our basic personal freedoms are at stake in cases like this. Folks pounded the Bush administration for listening into to overseas phone calls by possible terrorists that would harm us. Sure, it is an attack on privacy and personal freedom. But for those that are above the law, it isn't that big a deal. The same is true of video monitoring in stores and drunk driver check points. If you are not committing a crime, who cares?

The biggest threat to freedom I see is the government telling us what we have to purchase, such as health care, and what we can't buy; potentially firearms. Neither gives us freedom. If you want to cover the uninsured, do it, but don't force them to buy something they may not want. Firearms? Enforce strict licensing laws, there is no problem with that. If folks are not committing crimes they will comply without question in the same way they take their shoes off at the airport.

God in the public forum, it can't be as offensive as letting child molesters go on small bail bonds and short prison sentences, can it?

These persecutions are certainly on the rise, and I guess that it part and parcel of the End Times. What do you think, are you happy with your constitutional rights?

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

In the Blender - Green Tea and Cookies

I have a lot of kids in a wide range of hair colors and ages. Life was easier when I had a one of each, a blond and redhead. But then I met Mary Anne, and like most men, I wasn't thinking. She landed me upon the shores of happiness. (Read that, the altar)

Like a lot of folks, she is in a blended family and well, I am not. We have little Charlotte; age 6. Then there are two more girls, one teenager - just 19 and a young adult *cough* who is now 22.

We call them by their birthdays - the older one 1/22 and the younger one 2/26. That way the youngest "11/11" doesn't know who we are talking about just in case we have to use the words, "bone head" or "brat." She just thinks we're talking about Tom and Jerry.
1/22 started staying with us over the Christmas break, and 2/26 has moved in while she puts her life back together and figures out what she wants to be when she grows up.

The older girls pretty much lived with their mother after the divorce (2000), and just recently have started calling my home theirs. Some of that feels good. Divorce stinks the worst for the kids and they got a bad dose.

At a recent dinner I was listening to 2/26 talking with my wife.

2/26: Did you have a good day?

My Wife: Yes, did you?

2/26: Well it was boring.

My Wife: Why, didn't you work today?

2/26: It wasn't busy.

11/11: Well maybe you should go the playground.

2/26: It's winter out and it's cold.

11/11: Well you just have to find something to do.

My Wife: Do you want to go to school?

2/26: Not and study MATH!

My Wife: Don't you have anything else you like?

2/26: Not really, school is boring.

11/11: If you go to school, maybe they have a playground.

Dad: Or boys.

11/11: Boys are icky.

My Wife: You can say that again.

2/26: But they're not boring.

11/11: I'd rather watch Tom & Jerry.

Dad: Tom & Jerry aren't boring.

2/26: *Rolling eyes* the translation for which is "you're a dope" but I can't say that in this house.

My Wife: Does anyone want some tea and dessert.

A chorus of I do-s!

Dad: 2/26 can you help me clear the table?

2/26: Why should I?

Dad: Because I asked you too.

2/26: Well I don't see why I should have to take everyone else's plate to the kitchen.

Dad: Because you are part of a family.

11/11: Yeah, you're my sissy.

2/26: It's not fair.

Dad: Life's not fair.

My Wife: What kind of tea do you want? *looking for a chance to exit the calamity*

Dad: She can't have any until she does the dishes. *motioning to 2/26*

2/26: Fine.

1/22: Can I get the cookies?

11/11: She can too have tea.

Dad: Mind your business Missy.

11/11: Do you want to know how to say hello in Spanish?

Dad: Earl Grey

11/11: No, that's not right!

Dad: Yes.

11/11: Are you listening to me?

Dad: Hola!

My Wife: Here's your tea.

Dad: I think we need to say grace again.

1/22: Why?

Dad: Because it didn't seem to work the first time.

1/22: *rolling eyes* Whatever.

Dad: Hola.